Budd: Wakey wakey, eggs and bakey.

Bill: How do I look?
The Bride: You look ready.

Elle Driver: Bill.
Budd: Wrong brother, you hateful bitch.
Elle Driver: Budd.
Budd: Bingo!
Elle Driver: And to what do I owe this dubious pleasure?
Budd: I just caught me a cowgirl that ain't never been caught.
Elle Driver: Did you kill her?
Budd: Well, not yet I ain't. I shot her full of rock salt. She's so gentle right now, I could perform a coup-de-grace with a rock. Anywho. Guess what I'm holding in my hand right now.
Elle Driver: What?
Budd: Brand spankin' new Hattori Hanzo sword. Let me tell you Elle, that's what I call sharp.
Elle Driver: How much?
Budd: Well, that's hard to say, being that it's priceless and all.
Elle Driver: What's the terms?
Budd: Get your bony ass down here in the morning, with a million dollars in cash, and I give you the greatest sword ever made by man. How do you like the sound of that?
Elle Driver: Sounds like we got a deal, one condition.
Budd: What?
Elle Driver: She must suffer to her last breath.
Budd: Well, that little darlin', I can pretty much damn well guarantee.
Elle Driver: Then I'll see you in the morning... millionaire.

Elle Driver: Gross.

Esteban Vihaio: If I had met you forty years ago, you would have been my Number One lady.
The Bride: Well, I'm flattered.
Esteban Vihaio: You goddamn better well be.

Bill: Pai Mei taught you the five point palm-exploding heart technique?
The Bride: Of course he did.
Bill: Why didn't you tell me?
The Bride: I don't know... because I'm a bad person.
Bill: No. You're not a bad person. You're a terrific person. You're my favorite person, but every once in a while, you can be a real cunt.

The Bride: How did you find me?
Bill: I'm the man.

Budd: Looky here, bitch, this is a can of mace. Now, you're going underground tonight, and that's all there is to it. But, when I bury you, I was gonna bury you with this.
But if you're gonna act like a horse's ass, I'll spray this whole Goddamn can in your eyeballs. Then you'll be blind, burning, and buried alive. So what's it gonna be, sister?
That's a wise decision.

Bill: Well sweety, I love Mommy, but I did to Mommy what you did to Emilio.
B.B.: You stomped on Mommy?
Bill: Worse. I shot Mommy. Not pretend shoot, like we were just doing. I shot her for real.
B.B.: Why? Did you want to see what would happen?
Bill: No, I knew what would happen to Mommy if I shot her. What I didn't know is, when I shot Mommy, what would happen to me.
B.B.: What happened?
Bill: I was very sad. And that was when I learned, some things, once you do, they can never be undone.

Budd: So, which "R" you filled with?
Elle Driver: What?
Budd: They say the number one killer of old people is retirement. People got 'em a job to do, they tend to live a little longer so they can do it. I've always figured warriors and their enemies share the same relationship. So, now you ain't gonna hafta face your enemy on the battlefield no more, which "R" are you filled with: Relief or Regret?
Elle Driver: A little bit of both.
Budd: Horseshit? I'm sure you do feel a little bit of both. But I know damn well you feel one more than you feel the other. The question was, which one?
Elle Driver: Regret.
Budd: You gotta hand it to the old girl. I never saw nobody buffalo Bill the way she buffaloed Bill. Bill used to think she was so damn smart. I tried to tell him..."Bill, she's just smart for a blonde."

Elle Driver: Now in these last agonizing minutes of life you have left, let me answer the question you asked earlier more thoroughly. Right at this moment, the biggest "R" I feel is Regret. Regret that maybe the greatest warrior I have ever known, met her end at the hands of a bushwhackin, scrub, alky piece of shit like you. That woman deserved better.

Bill: I suppose the traditional way to conclude this is, we cross Hanzo swords. Well, it just so happens, this hacienda comes with its very own private beach. And this private beach just so happens to look particularly beautiful bathed in moonlight. And there just so happens to be a full moon out tonight. So, swordfighter, if you want to sword fight, that's where I suggest. But if you wanna be old school about it - and you know I'm all about old school - then we can wait till dawn, and slice each other up at sunrise, like a couple real-life, honest-to-goodness samurais.

Esteban Vihaio: Bill is like a son to me. You know why I help you?
The Bride: No.
Esteban Vihaio: He would want me to.
The Bride: Now that I don't believe.
Esteban Vihaio: How else is he going to see you again?

Budd: I'm a bouncer in a titty bar, Bill. If she wants to fight me, all she gotta do is come down to the Club, start some shit, and we'll be in a fight.
Bill: I know we haven't spoken for quite some time, and the last time we spoke wasn't the most pleasant. But you need to get over being mad at me, and start becoming afraid of
[beep]
Bill: . Because she is coming, and she's coming to kill you. And unless you accept my assistance, I have no doubt she will succeed.
Budd: That woman deserves her revenge... and we deserve to die.
But then again, so does she.

The Bride: You any good with that shotgun?
Karen Kim: Not that I have to be at this range, but I'm a fucking surgeon with this shotgun.
The Bride: Well, guess what, bitch? I'm better than Annie Oakley and I've got you right in my sights.

The Bride: I was wondering, just between us girls, what did you say to Pai Mei for him to snatch out your eye?
Elle Driver: I called him a miserable old fool.
The Bride: Ooh, bad idea.
Elle Driver: You know what I did? I killed that miserable old fool.
Elle Driver: How do you like the fishheads you miserable old fool?
Elle Driver: I poisoned his fishheads.
Pai Mei: Elle, you treacherous dog. I give you my word...
Elle Driver: And I told him, "To me the word of an old fool like you is worth less than nothing."
Elle Driver: That's right. I killed your master. And now I'm gonna kill you, with your own sword, no less, which in the very immediate future, will become... my sword.
The Bride: Bitch, you don't have a future.

The Bride: You and I have unfinished business.
Bill: Baby, you ain't kidding.

Bill: When you didn't come back, I naturally assumed that Lisa Wong or somebody else had killed you. Oh, and for the record, letting someone think that someone they love is dead when they're not is quite cruel. I mourned you for three months. And in the third month, I tracked you down. Now, I wasn't trying to track you down. I was trying to track down the fucking assholes who I thought killed you. So, I find you. And what do I find? Not only are you not dead, you're getting married to some fucking jerk and you're pregnant. I... overreacted.
The Bride: You overreacted?

The Bride: May I have a glass of water, please?

The Bride: Looked dead, didn't I? But I wasn't. But it wasn't from lack of trying, I can tell you that. Actually, Bill's last bullet put me in a coma - A coma I was to lie in for four years. When I woke up, I went on what the movie advertisements refer to as a 'roaring rampage of revenge.' I roared. And I rampaged. And I got bloody satisfaction. I've killed a hell of a lot of people to get to this point, but I have only one more. The last one. The one I'm driving to right now. The only one left. And when I arrive at my destination, I am gonna kill Bill.

Bill: I'm a killer. A murdering bastard, you know that. And there are consequences to breaking the heart of a murdering bastard.

Elle Driver: In Africa, the saying goes 'In the bush, an elephant can kill you, a leopard can kill you, and a black mamba can kill you. But only with the mamba is death sure.' Hence its handle, 'Death Incarnate.'" Pretty cool, huh? The venom of a black mamba can kill a human in four hours, if, say, bitten on the ankle or the thumb. However, a bite to the face or torso can bring death from paralysis within 20 minutes. Now, you should listen to this, 'cause this concerns you. The amount of venom that can be delivered from a single bite can be gargantuan. You know, I've always liked that word..."gargantuan"... so rarely have an opportunity to use it in a sentence. If not treated quickly with antivenom, 10 to 15 milligrams can be fatal to human beings. However, the black mamba can deliver as much as 100 to 400 milligrams of venom from a single bite.

Bill: An essential characteristic of the superhero mythology is, there's the superhero, and there's the alter ego. Batman is actually Bruce Wayne, Spider-Man is actually Peter Parker. When he wakes up in the morning, he's Peter Parker. He has to put on a costume to become Spider-Man. And it is in that characteristic that Superman stands alone. Superman did not become Superman, Superman was born Superman. When Superman wakes up in the morning, he's Superman. His alter ego is Clark Kent. His outfit with the big red "S", that's the blanket he was wrapped in as a baby when the Kents found him. Those are his clothes. What Kent wears, the glasses, the business suit, that's the costume. That's the costume Superman wears to blend in with us. Clark Kent is how Superman views us. And what are the characteristics of Clark Kent? He's weak, he's unsure of himself... he's a coward. Clark Kent is Superman's critique on the whole human race. Sort of like Beatrix Kiddo and Mrs. Tommy Plympton.

Budd: Larry, there ain't nobody out there!
Larry Gomez: There ain't nobody out there... Larry... What's your point? That you're not needed here?
Budd: My point is, I'm the bouncer... and there ain't nobody out there to bounce!
Larry Gomez: You're saying that the reason... that you're not doing the job... that I'm... paying you to do... is, that you don't have a job to do? Is that what you're saying? What are you trying to convince me of, exactly? That you're as useless as an asshole right here? Well guess what, Buddy. I think, you just fucking convinced me!

The Bride: To my brother Budd, the only man I ever loved, Bill.

The Bride: What are you doing here?
Bill: What am I doing? A moment ago, I was playin' my flute. But this moment, I'm looking at the most beautiful bride these old eyes have ever seen.
The Bride: Why are you here?
Bill: Last look.
The Bride: Are you going to be nice?
Bill: I've never been nice my whole life, but I'll do my best... to be sweet.

Budd: You're telling me she cut through eighty-eight bodyguards before she got to O-Ren?
Bill: Nah, there weren't really eighty-eight of them. They just called themselves "The Crazy 88."
Budd: How come?
Bill: I don't know. I guess they thought it sounded cool.

The Bride: Before that strip turned blue, I was a woman. I was your woman. I was a killer who killed for you. Before that strip turned blue, I would have jumped a motorcycle onto a speeding train... for you. But once that strip turned blue, I could no longer do any of those things. Not anymore. Because I was going to be a mother. Can you understand that?

B.B: Did you dream of me, Mommy? I dreamed of you.
The Bride :Every single night, baby.

Bill: He hates Caucasians, despises Americans, and has nothing but contempt for women... so in your case, it might take a while.

Budd: This is for breaking my brother's heart.

Budd: That gentled ya down some. Ain't nobody a badass with a double dose of rock salt that deep in their tits. Not havin tits as fine or big as yours, I can't even imagine how bad that shit must sting... yet I don't want to, neither.
I win.

Pai Mei: Your so-called kung-fu - is really - quite pathetic.

Ernie: Whoa... look at those eyes. This bitch is furious!
White women call this the silent treatment... and we let 'em think we don't like it.

The Bride: You want to come to the wedding?
Bill: Only if I can sit on the bride's side.
The Bride: You'll find it a bit lonely on my side.
Bill: Your side always was a bit lonely. But I wouldn't sit anywhere else.

Bill: Was my reaction really that surprising?
The Bride: Yes, it was. Could you do what you did? Of course you could. But, I never thought you could or would do that to me.
Bill: I'm really sorry, Kiddo. You thought wrong.

Larry Gomez: I don't know what car wash allowed you to walk in twenty minutes late, but it wasn't owned by me and I own a fucking car wash.
Let's go to the calendar! It's calendar time! Calendar time for Buddy!

The Bride: I'm the deadliest woman in the world. But right now, I'm just scared shitless for my baby.

Elle Driver: Bill tells me you had a Hanzo sword once.
Budd: Yeah.
Elle Driver: How does this one compare to that one?
Budd: If you're gonna compare a Hanzo sword, you compare it to every other sword ever made... that wasn't made by Hattori Hanzo.

Larry Gomez: The hat. That fucking hat. How many times did I tell you not to wear that fucking hat?
Budd: Customers wear hats.
Larry Gomez: I'm not the boss of the customers, but I'm the boss of you, and I'm telling you to keep that shit kicker hat at home.

Jay: You're late again. Budd, can't you tell time?
Budd: There ain't nobody in here, man.
Larry Gomez: Hey, Jay! Is Budd out there?
Jay: Yeah.
Larry Gomez: Tell him to get his fucking ass in here!
Jay: Okay!
Budd, Larry'd like a word with you.

The lioness has rejoined her cub, and all is right in the jungle.